The Powerful Start to a Positive Attitude

This article is another in a series I am writing about the positive attitude attributes found on the self-reflection report card in Jeffrey Gitomer’s book “The Little Golden Book of Yes”.

In my opinion, this one is where it all starts. It is the concept of self-belief. The definition of self-belief I found through various sources is the confidence in one’s self and trust in their own abilities. Another one added, “the belief you can do things well”.

It makes sense that a positive attitude and positive results start with the belief and trust in one’s abilities. The more you believe and trust and in yourself, the more likely your attitude and outlook on life will be good. When your attitude is positive, it leads you to take the necessary action towards your goals instead of finding reasons why you can’t.

One question often asked is by those who especially have lacked self-belief during their lives. It is often very difficult to just turn on the switch and start believing in one’s self when life has been filled with one doubt and failure after the other. There are many ways to change this attitude. For this article, I will provide my thoughts and share a very helpful article from another author.

One giant step to developing self-belief is to know who you really are. I have been reminded of this constantly in the past year and a half. Yes, you are a body, frail that it might be, that is on this earth for approximately 80 years. However, according to the Bible, within that body is the kingdom of Heaven itself. The very power that runs the universe dwells within each one of us. This Godly power never fails. Even if you have failed countless times (I know I sure have), the God within you NEVER fails. When you rely on this all-knowing, all-powerful energy and guidance, your doubts and failures will quickly turn to faithful victories. Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s impossible or you can’t do it. Know that the God power within you can guide you and make it happen. Isn’t it a great peace to know that it’s not all up to you? Knowing this in itself is a great step to self-belief. When you turn to your “God-self”, you can’t go wrong.

In addition to realizing that the God of the universe dwells in you and has your life completely in control (if you let Him), I found another source of excellent information. This article, “7 Steps to Self-Belief” is a great guide to turning your attitude around and enhancing your self-belief. Even following some of them will help you.

I will say once again that I can’t think of any better first step in improving your attitude than self-belief. Even if you’ve never had it before, you can make positive changes today. Know that the kingdom of Heaven dwells in you, and spend time each day motivating yourself, changing the negative voice inside your head, and visualizing the success you desire. You can do whatever you set out to do. You just need to believe it. Enjoy the blessings 🙂

 

When You Kill Them With Kindness You Bring Them to Life

Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heart. – Proverbs 3:3

A man who is kind benefits himself, but a cruel man hurts himself – Proverbs 11:17

This article is a continuation of a series I am sharing about positive and powerful attitude attributes in Jeffrey Gitomer’s book “The Little Golden Book of Yes”. It is part of a positive attitude report card shared in the book where the readers rate themselves on a scale of 1-5 to monitor their level of positive attitude. I have taken the challenge of trying to rate 5 for as many as the 22 attributes as possible. I challenge you to do the same, as doing so can drastically change the amount of positivity and power in your life.

The attribute I discuss today is kindness. The definition I found for kindness is the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. It doesn’t sound too difficult to me, though I often wonder why so many people in the world today have such difficulty practicing it. I can’t say that I am perfect in practicing this in every situation, but I can say this…I have seen so many times how even just one simple kind act can not only change someone’s day, but can change their entire outlook on a negative situation, ultimately enhancing one’s quality of life.

There are so many more Bible verses about kindness than the ones I shared at the beginning of the post. Besides being listed as one of the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5, one more that grabs my attention is Proverbs 25:11 which says that “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver”. Often times, that fitly spoken word is a kind word. The second verse above says a man who is kind benefits. However, I find it more amazing that it is other people that benefit most when we are kind. And if you really want to stand out like gold, be kind in situations where kindness is not warranted or expected. It is extremely rare that people are kind when they have been wronged or hurt by someone. However, you can really be a true, Godly example by demonstrating such an attitude. It’s not easy to do, but I love the shock (or even frustration sometimes) on someone’s face when I return their negative or even rude behavior with kindness. Even if they don’t change from it, I at least get the satisfaction of knowing I handled the situation right and some kind of justice has been served.

As you can see, everyone wins when you demonstrate kindness. You benefit yourself, and most importantly, you make life better for those around you. The challenge going forward is to find as many opportunities as you can to demonstrate kindness to others (and please don’t forget to be kind to yourself as well). Even in difficult situations, find ways to kill ’em with kindness. Eventually it becomes habit, and the magnificent blessings magnify for you and everyone else. Enjoy them 🙂

Proof That a Simple Smile Can Make You Happy

A smiling face is a beautiful face. A smiling heart is a happy heart – Dr. T.P Chia.

I am continuing a series of articles today from the top life-changing attitude attributes from Jeffery Gitomer’s book “The Golden Book of Yes”. These are habits that, when developed, will keep your attitude at its most positive, and enable you to be the confident, capable you are intended to be.

Today’s attitude attribute is one I firmly believe in. It is very simple, yet many of us ignore its amazing benefits. The command (if you can even call it that) is to smile. It is amazing how much power a smile has. Its benefits to you and to those around you are very much underestimated, especially in today’s fast-paced, stressful world.

I find the significance and power of a smile so important, I made it the first chapter of my book, “30 Days to a More Powerful Life”. I share this chapter with you here….

How much power does a smile have? Think about holding or watching a baby. What happens when that baby innocently smiles at us? Well, I cannot think of one human being that would not smile back at the baby, regardless of the mood they are in. If the smile of an infant only several months old can have such a positive effect, can it be the same with older kids and adults? I am a firm believer in the power of a smile. In his book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, Dale Carnegie notes that a smile is a simple way to make a great first impression.[i] Based on what I have read and my own observations, here are several powerful effects of a smile:

• It makes us feel good about ourselves. I’m not an expert on psychology, but it is said that not only do our actions follow our emotions, but it can work the other way around. When we smile, positive emotions follow. By smiling and remaining positive, we have a better outlook on all aspects of our life.
• We receive positive reactions from others. Think of the baby and how we smile back. In most cases, if we smile at someone, they will smile back.
• It is a sign of confidence. Think of those who constantly have smiles on their faces. Doesn’t it seem like they have everything totally under control?
• It can solve a negative situation. I’ve dealt with angry customers and upset students. When I approach them with a smile and gentleness, they are much more willing to listen and cooperate.

Smiling is also known to have several health benefits. I read an article online by Dr. Mark Stibich. He lists 10 ways that smiling affects our health, stress level, and attractiveness:[ii]

1. Smiling makes us more attractive.
2. Smiling improves our mood.
3. Smiling is contagious.
4. Smiling relieves stress.
5. Smiling boosts your immune system.
6. Smiling lowers blood pressure.
7. Smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers, and Serotonin. It’s a natural drug!
8. Smiling lifts the face and makes you look younger.
9. Smiling makes you seem successful.
10. Smiling helps you stay positive.

I love the test Dr. Stibich includes at the end of his article. He challenges us to smile, and then try to think of something negative without losing the smile. It is very difficult to do because the smile sends the message that all is well in our worlds, and it conflicts and actually repels any negative thoughts.

As you can see, there are plenty of other benefits to a smile. It is such a simple concept, yet how many of us fail to do this? I do my best to keep a smile on my face, but sometimes still end up doing so much less than I should. Smiling is contagious. Starting from just one person, it can spread joy very quickly, and have powerful impacts on everyone in the office, classroom, household, or whatever environment. Why not help ourselves and those around us stay positive and enjoy life simply by smiling often? It is a challenge that I am willing to take, and I suggest it to you too.

Action Plan: As mentioned, smiling is a very easy thing to do. Even when things are not going as well as we would like, we can make a conscious effort to smile, and it can make a difference in our circumstances. Whenever you think of it throughout the day, allow yourself to smile. The more you do it, the more natural it becomes. Eventually, you begin to experience the many benefits mentioned above. The result is a happier and more beneficial life for you and for those around you.

[i] Carnegie, D. (1936) How to Win Friends and Influence People, 95. New York. Simon and Schuster.

[ii] Stibich, M. Ph.D, Top 10 Reasons to Smile. About.com. Updated February 4, 2010.

I certainly hope this information convinces you to smile more today. As you will see, the more you do so, the better you will feel and will help others do the same. Enjoy the blessings 🙂

You Can Instantly Destroy Worry

I very much enjoy listening to sermons and inspirational messages from around the country. They are readily available online and I enjoy being inspired by these great speakers as often as possible.

I heard one such message yesterday from the C3 church in Orlando Florida (you can listen here for the full message) and felt the need to share as soon as possible. The message was about worry. The pastor shares how worry does absolutely nothing to help us, yet we often continue to make a habit out of it instead of focusing on God’s promises to move forward in our lives and accomplish our goals. The pastor then shares some excellent advice on how you can remove doubt by seeking God and His kingdom first, and relying on His promises to carry you through any obstacles to develop the necessary faith to accomplish God’s will for your life.

This all occurred as I am in the middle of re-reading a book I have read several times called “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle (further proof that God does things for a reason). This potentially life-changing book shares the importance of remaining focused on the present moment and “living there” as often as possible. As I heard the sermon last night, I instantly realized another excellent way to avoid worry. That is…remaining as often as possible in the present moment.

When you remain in the present moment it is impossible to worry. If you don’t believe me, I challenge you to try it. What is worry anyway? It is fear about a future event. Even if that event is only minutes away, it is still in the future. When you remain squarely focused on the present moment you have full control. There is absolutely nothing to fear in the present moment. Even if there is some crazy situation happening (like you are in the middle of a street and a car is coming at you at that moment) your instinct will take over and you will act at that moment to avoid the negative situation.

I find that when I place my full focus on the present moment, fear disappears instantly. And when I follow Jesus’s advice of seeking Him and the Kingdom first, a feeling of faith and power takes over what was once doubt and worry. It is then that I am setting myself up for blessing and miracles. The same is true for you.

Do you want to break the worry habit? If your answer is yes, simply anchor yourself in the present moment as often as possible. You can pray and take action yes, but even if you just spend several minutes observing and enjoying whatever is happening at that time, you are destroying the power that worry can have in your life. So why not take even just a few minutes at a time to enjoy the gift that is the present and destroy worry and its negative feelings? The more you enjoy the positive feelings that arrive as a result, the more you will want to continue this habit and reap the benefits. Enjoy the blessings 🙂

Think Yes First

When you think of your greatest desire, or a goal you want to accomplish, what is the first thing you think of regarding the possibility of its completion? When someone asks you a question, what is usually your response, or even the tone of it? This answer usually depends on the quality of your attitude. When you have a positive attitude, and you think about the possibility of accomplishing your goal, you usually think in yes terms. When someone asks you a question while you are maintaining a positive frame of mind, you tend to answer in the affirmative. Of course, the opposite is true if you maintain a negative frame of mind.

I am continuing in a series regarding positive attitude attributes found in Jeffrey Gitomer’s book, “The Little Golden Book of Yes”. Practicing these positive attitudes and making them habit can easily transform your life. It makes sense that thinking yes first can speed up this process. I share an exaggerated example, but one that proves this point very well. A great movie I’ve seen in recent years is a Jim Carey movie called “The Yes Man”. Carey plays a man who is generally unhappy in life, mainly because of focusing on fears which have led to a negative attitude. He attends a seminar which he is challenged to say yes to everything in life. He cannot say no. It leads to him leaving his comfort zone and trying some crazy things that he would have never thought to do before. However, for the first time in his life he feels a sense of adventure and fulfillment, and his life changes in many positive ways. These situations and relationships would have never occurred if he didn’t think yes first and had automatically thought no as he always did before.

This movie really challenged me. Yes, it is an extreme and humorous way to teach a lesson, but it is one that has stuck with me in the years since I have seen this film. In many ways I limited myself because of an automatic no response, instead of thinking yes and seeing where it would lead me. I wish I can say I’ve completely gone away from the no thinking and letting fear rob me of potential blessings. However, I realize how valuable a yes attitude is and how thinking yes first can lead me and anyone else to receiving blessings I would never have imagined I have experienced these blessings and yes is my first thought. It is true that I may have to be uncomfortable and even inconvenienced, but the blessings and rewards far outweigh any discomfort.

I challenge you to think yes first. You don’t have to say yes to everything. In fact, in the movie, Carey learns that it is not always possible and even beneficial to say yes to everything. However, do all you can to think yes first. At first, this may be a hard habit to break. It was for me, and as mentioned, yes is still not completely automatic. If your knee-jerk reaction is no, quickly bring yourself back and think how the no could be a yes. The more you do it, the easier it gets. And when you feel the wonderful feelings of the blessings and miracles it brings, you will be motivated to do it more.

Can it be done? Can your life be changed simply by focusing on a yes response as often as possible? I answer with a resounding YES!!! Enjoy the blessings 🙂

Jumpstart Your Success

As I mentioned in my previous post, I am beginning a series of articles on positive attitude attributes found in Jeffrey Gitomer’s book, “The Little Golden Book of Yes”. I am taking 22 yes attitude attributes from his self-reflection and report card section of the book. You can rate yourself on the level of your positive attitude you have by giving yourself a score of 1-5 for each. I have made it a point to get 5 for as many of them as possible each day.

The first attribute I will discuss is a logical one to jumpstart your success. It is quite simple, yet sometimes easier said than done. However, making this a key habit can make a major difference in your level of success each day. The simple attribute is to start EVERY day on a positive note. Begin the day immediately with thoughts of success and how you will excel. Here are some ways to accomplish this each day:

• Gratitude – Immediately reflect on the things you are thankful for in life. It can be anything from health and protection, your family, money (no matter how much or little you have), and basics like food, clothing, electricity, or whatever you place your mental focus on.
• Affirmations – Affirm positive words and phrases to yourself to set and maintain a positive frame of mind. I often do this in the shower first thing in the morning to help wake myself up and fill my mind with positive reminders.
• Visualize your day – I find it very helpful to determine what I need to do to be successful that day. Then, usually as I enjoy my breakfast and coffee, I visualize myself succeeding in those endeavors throughout the day.
• Determine how you can be a blessing – On many occasions, opportunities to bless others arrive spontaneously. However, when I think in advance of things I can do to be a blessing to others, it keeps me in that state of mind to look for ways I can give to others and take them to a higher level.
• Pray – I spend my 20 minute drive to work with no radio, music, or any type of distraction. The time is spent in prayer for a successful day for me and those close to me. This alone can be a powerful way to begin a successful day.

These are just some suggestions of how you can begin each day on a positive note. I understand that sometimes you know from the beginning that the day will be difficult to face. However, instead of dreading it and going into it with a negative attitude, prepare yourself right away for success, knowing that you can overcome any obstacle with the right frame of mind. Set yourself up for success by immediately filling your mind with positive thoughts at the start of each day. Once this becomes a regular habit, it will become as natural as anything else in your morning routine. Even better, it will add more success and joy to your life, and it contagiously translates to others as well. Enjoy the blessings 🙂

Back to Basics

It’s been a while since I’ve written at this site. Or anywhere at all for that matter. I apologize to those looking here for helpful, uplifting information. Sometimes life takes over (or as in this case we allow it to) and energy is needed somewhere else.

In many ways, 2015 has been an up and down year. I have continued to grow as a person and in my relationship with God. My entire family and I continue to be healthy and protected and enjoy a blessed life. However, in other ways, this year has been a step back. I have gone away from some of the great information and advice I’ve learned and share with you. As a result, I’ve experienced a stagnancy and more lower level emotions lately than the more energetic, higher vibrations that lead to greater blessing and enjoyment of life.

As I asked myself how to get back on the right track, it didn’t take long to answer the question. During other times in my life where I felt the same type of emotions, I succeeded by following a simple formula….get back to the basics. Other successful people in all fields follow the same advice. When a baseball player is in a hitting slump, he often returns to the very basics of hitting, from the stance, swing, and all of the taken for granted technical skills that made him successful in the first place. When a sales person is not selling, they often go back to the books and re-learn the basic skills of successful selling, once again doing the little things that brought big success.

As I reflected on this back to the basics mentality, I was almost immediately lead to a valuable resource of mine. When I first began the path to self-discovery and personal development over 8 years ago, I found and read a book by Jeffrey Gitomer called “The Little Golden Book of Yes”. It was this book that helped me realize how much my own attitude made the biggest difference in life, regardless of the obstacles I was facing. It made me realize I was the only person that determined how successful my life would or would not be, and I was fully responsible. I would highly recommend it to anyone, whether you are just beginning your personal discovery journey or you just need to get back to the basics. It was also this book that led me to discover some other great books I read, such as “The Power of Positive Thinking”, “Think and Grow Rich”, and “The Secret”. These books then inspired me to do further research and learning which have taken my life to a new level and has helped me do the same for others.

As I go back to basics, I am reading this book again (I’ve read it several times but it’s been a while). I realize I have learned a lot since the first time I read this book, but it has shown me how much I’ve been skipping over the basics lately, which is one main reason I am feeling like I am not where I want to be at this point. I also realize that if I begin to once again follow these very easy basics, I will quickly get back to my own personal growth and satisfy the desire to bring many people to a higher level in their lives.

That is where you come in. As a way to help myself get back to basics and get back to writing, I will share over the next few weeks some of these simple basics that can make major positive impacts in your life. It’s just a matter of getting into the habit of doing them on a regular basis. In the book, Gitomer presents a Yes Attitude self-reflection and report card. There are 22 personal attributes where you rate yourself on a scale of 1-5. At the end, you add your score and he tells you where you stand regarding your attitude attributes.

I will share these attributes with you over the next few weeks. I have made it my goal, as often as possible, to score a 5 in as many of these as I can each day. In fact, I rate myself every day and base my success on my score. I challenge you to do the same. As always, I welcome you to share how these or other attributes work for you, and how you get yourself back to the basics of life when you feel the need. In the meantime, enjoy the blessings 🙂